Amidst the worst
responses put forth
as doors swing from both directions,
one
is blue,
another
is red
It was a bad idea to believe
fish could live out of water
or that we could submerge ourselves
into water ill equipped to
sustain our breathing
Raunchiness of animosity …
reckless, rude, riotous,
developed in a vicious mind or when
you woke up on the wrong side of the rising sun and
can’t float on papier-mache cutouts …
if I’m drowning in a pool of mud
that’s breached a portal and
seeped in many different directions
responses put forth
as doors swing from both directions,
one
is blue,
another
is red
It was a bad idea to believe
fish could live out of water
or that we could submerge ourselves
into water ill equipped to
sustain our breathing
Raunchiness of animosity …
reckless, rude, riotous,
developed in a vicious mind or when
you woke up on the wrong side of the rising sun and
can’t float on papier-mache cutouts …
if I’m drowning in a pool of mud
that’s breached a portal and
seeped in many different directions
Some thrilling words here: a bit of a nightmare poured out. Several prompts gleaming through.
ReplyDeletePamela, Your rich use of language is masterful. I love the assonance and alliteration in this piece. Well done.
ReplyDeleteSome very telling images.
ReplyDeleteI love the seamless flow of this poem from one image to another. Vivid words, Pam.
ReplyDeleteThe flow of images here do build on one another, but I find myself drawn to those doors swinging "from both directions" - that does seem a fundamentally bad idea - it hints at collision.
ReplyDeleteYour words bowl me over, Pamela! I love "doors swing from both directions," and "can’t float on papier-mache cutouts." Your poems are a tour de force!
ReplyDeleteIt's kaleidoscopic, stroboscopic - brilliant!
ReplyDeleteI too love the swinging doors, and floating on papeir mache cutouts. But also like the line about waking on the wrong side of sunrise. And again, your language flows carrying your reader through the constantly rolling images. Beautiful, Pamela,
ReplyDeleteElizabeth
Oh so good! These bad ideas!
ReplyDeleteThe scariest part is when a nightmare becomes reality, Viv. I suppose I have the floating prompt in there as well.
ReplyDeleteBrilliantly written Pamela....such amazing imagery! I felt as though I was swirling through a nightmare of beauty and terror!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much, Brenda:)
ReplyDeleteI suppose you are right, Dave.
ReplyDeleteThanks Mary:)
ReplyDeleteThat's what happens, Mr. Walker:)
ReplyDeleteI can’t float on papier-mache cutouts, but I believe some think they can, Marianne.
ReplyDeleteThanks Stan:)
ReplyDeleteDon't some folks wake on the wrong side of the sun, Elizabeth? Thanks.
ReplyDeleteSome ideas just don't work out, Annell.
ReplyDeleteVery nice of you, Gloria.
ReplyDeleteGreat images, love the papier-mache reference!
ReplyDeleteThanks Andy, how nice of you:)
ReplyDeleteReckless, rude, riotous...
ReplyDeleteWhat can I say, it is getting near the end, Ron;)
ReplyDeleteWonderful writing! I loved the waking on the wrong side of the rising sun...... beautiful. I also am really struck by the glorious March moon-rise over to the right. Wow!
ReplyDeleteIt can happen to some people, Sherry;) Those photos are something, aren't they?
ReplyDeleteI was caught up in "the door swings both directions". So much metaphor in this one for me, so much anger.
ReplyDeletehttp://judyidliketosay.blogspot.com/2011/04/world-without-computers.html
Loads of metaphor, but not much anger really, Judy. Just resignation.
ReplyDeleteWe are not kind to our planet and I agree that it does feel like 'how much can we do'? Your poem says volumes and that as small as it seems it so much. Thank You!
ReplyDeleteQuite true, Renee. And thank you.
ReplyDelete