"Life is the dancer and you are the dance."
— Eckhart Tolle

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

'see you later' we write poems #19 begin with music

I got misty eyes as they said farewell
always goodbye means:
Never to meet again
au revoir, adios, ciao, hasta nunca
As he placed a veil before my eyes
to protect me from the harshness of light
fall into the cavern of impediment
Did you get misty-eyed as well?
it’s so much easier to remove castles
from my eyes while kings and queens
dance a promenade with fancy fans
swaying to the rhythm of a forgotten sound
Silken powdered noses don’t sense treachery
while under the perfect sadness of farewell
Posted by flaubert at 9:24 PM

30 comments:

  1. UnknownSeptember 15, 2010 at 4:06 AM

    Those last two lines are great, Pamela!

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  2. MarySeptember 15, 2010 at 4:53 AM

    I liked the lines:

    It's so much easier to remove castles
    from my eyes while kings and queens
    dance a promenade with fancy fans.

    An enjoyable read, Pamela.

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  3. gautami tripathySeptember 15, 2010 at 5:21 AM

    "As he placed a veil before my eyes
    to protect me from the harshness of light
    fall into the cavern of impediment"

    I loved the above lines!

    warming up the worms

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  4. pwfSeptember 15, 2010 at 7:05 AM

    Hasta nunca. Until never. Is that a "genuine" Spanish phrase or your construction?

    I believe the lords and ladies in the lace and satin carried scented pomanders against the plague. Treachery is not unlike

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  5. UmaSeptember 15, 2010 at 8:16 AM

    This is so good Pamela, from the first to those beautiful last two lines.

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  6. LindaSeptember 15, 2010 at 8:33 AM

    This line was so evocative:
    swaying to the rhythm of a forgotten sound

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  7. barbaraSeptember 15, 2010 at 8:41 AM

    where-ever did you get "cavern of impediment"?

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  8. flaubertSeptember 15, 2010 at 9:38 AM

    Thanks so much Derrick!
    Pamela

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  9. flaubertSeptember 15, 2010 at 9:38 AM

    Thank you Mary!
    Pamela

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  10. flaubertSeptember 15, 2010 at 9:39 AM

    Gautami thanks!
    Pamela

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  11. flaubertSeptember 15, 2010 at 9:50 AM

    pwf it is indeed a Spanish phrase but not commonly used. `Hasta jamás` is used more frequently. That means `until never` which indicates you do not wish to see that person ever again! It is very harsh.
    Pamela

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  12. flaubertSeptember 15, 2010 at 9:52 AM

    Uma thanks and that is nice of you!
    Pamela

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  13. flaubertSeptember 15, 2010 at 9:53 AM

    Linda thanks!
    Pamela

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  14. flaubertSeptember 15, 2010 at 10:00 AM

    Barb I don't recall what I had written originally. I would have to go look in my journal but it was cavern of something or another. So, I changed it to impediment and it seemed to work.
    Pamela

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  15. AnonymousSeptember 15, 2010 at 12:07 PM

    Such complex loveliness to illustrate the finality of farewell. So many beautiful phrases, like 'fall into the cavern of impediment' or to 'remove castles from my eyes'. There is such a wholeness/integrity to this poem. Much appreciated.

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  16. Diane TSeptember 15, 2010 at 1:35 PM

    A beautifully written poem, Pamela. So many ways to say farewell.

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  17. MarianVSeptember 15, 2010 at 2:37 PM

    I love sad poems. This was sad & beautiful

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  18. flaubertSeptember 15, 2010 at 5:15 PM

    Thanks happyflowers!
    Pamela

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  19. flaubertSeptember 15, 2010 at 5:16 PM

    Diane yes there are and thanks!
    Pamela

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  20. flaubertSeptember 15, 2010 at 5:17 PM

    Marian thanks!
    Pamela

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  21. Judy RoneySeptember 15, 2010 at 7:28 PM

    I could see this as a lavish production on stage as I read it. I really like where this took me.

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  22. AnonymousSeptember 16, 2010 at 1:14 AM

    Quiet little surprises of word and phrase in your poem here. I like that progression of emotional energy. Rather nice Pamela.

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  23. flaubertSeptember 16, 2010 at 4:36 PM

    Thanks Judy and welcome to we write poems!
    Pamela

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  24. flaubertSeptember 16, 2010 at 4:37 PM

    Thanks Neil and thanks for visiting!
    Pamela

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  25. Carrie Van HornSeptember 17, 2010 at 8:55 AM

    Pamela this is truly beautiful! :-)

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  26. AnonymousSeptember 17, 2010 at 2:41 PM

    This poem is absolutely gorgeous and delicate, like the veil in the fifth line. Yet so much in these few lines...speaking of disappointment, heartbreak, and deception. I like where you went with the prompt this week.

    -Nicole

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  27. Wayne PitchkoSeptember 17, 2010 at 8:15 PM

    nicely done Pam....moves so well to a great ending

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  28. flaubertSeptember 18, 2010 at 4:00 PM

    Thanks Carrie!
    Pamela

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  29. flaubertSeptember 18, 2010 at 4:01 PM

    Thanks so much Nicole and I know that song is a happy one, but I found some sadness in it.
    Pamela

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  30. flaubertSeptember 18, 2010 at 4:04 PM

    Thanks, my friend Wayne and happy weekend to you and yours!
    Pamela

    ReplyDelete

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