"Life is the dancer and you are the dance."
— Eckhart Tolle

Thursday, May 26, 2011

"Life in your Room" Poets United Thursday Think Tank #51-chocolate

Willows rest in place under a dimness
Big brass horns playing in a sad foreground
Piles of chocolate on your table,
consumed as it slowly melts in your hands

Fine down pillows, mahogany bed frames,
neon lights short circuit at 3 am
Streets glisten from rain; thick air like casing
Moisture fills your sleep apnea; sweat forms
somewhere beneath your eyes furrowed sorrow

A worn little puppet sits on your shelf
It’s reminiscent of days now long past
His clothes are torn and dirty, sewn little
patches of gathered scraps; hope can’t hold him
together.  Watch the sunrise fill your room
Look out your window for crows with black plumes
Posted by flaubert at 1:21 PM

29 comments:

  1. bttrflyscarMay 26, 2011 at 1:43 PM

    what imagery. lovely work.

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  2. flaubertMay 26, 2011 at 3:10 PM

    Thanks, am.

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  3. Butterflies of timeMay 26, 2011 at 4:23 PM

    "; hope can’t hold him
    together. ' lovely line. Can imagine the room. Nice!

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  4. MaryMay 26, 2011 at 5:02 PM

    This is inspired, Pamela! i like the images.

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  5. Dick JonesMay 26, 2011 at 5:06 PM

    There's a powerful sense of insomniac claustrophobia to this intense poem. Disturbing and highly effective.

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  6. flaubertMay 26, 2011 at 5:14 PM

    Thanks for the visit butterflies!

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  7. flaubertMay 26, 2011 at 5:17 PM

    Mary, I started this yesterday, and I wasn't sure where I was going with it. Then I saw the "chocolate" prompt, and changed a few lines. This is the end result.

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  8. flaubertMay 26, 2011 at 5:21 PM

    I had a southern cityscape in mind for this, Dick. Hot, sticky, humid night with no where to go, and you can't sleep. I am glad it was effective. Thanks.

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  9. MaggieMay 26, 2011 at 6:12 PM

    Oh, this was fabulous. : )

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  10. AnonymousMay 26, 2011 at 7:02 PM

    this is haunting. it's beautiful and melancholy.

    (it's Fireblossom...Blogger isn't letting me comment sometimes, lately)

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  11. flaubertMay 26, 2011 at 9:28 PM

    Thanks thingy.

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  12. flaubertMay 26, 2011 at 9:31 PM

    Thanks Shay, I am glad it had that effect.

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  13. Judith C EvansMay 26, 2011 at 10:34 PM

    What a lovely, dreamy poem. beautiful use of this prompt.

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  14. kaykualaMay 27, 2011 at 10:35 AM

    Pam,
    Just as you had replied to Mary, I often do the same. I just sort of dream around some lines and then where it is convenient later, relate it to a prompt following some minor changes. Yours turned out beautifully!

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  15. Sherry Blue SkyMay 27, 2011 at 11:18 AM

    So so beautiful. I love the wonderfully rich images. You put me right there.

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  16. flaubertMay 27, 2011 at 12:00 PM

    Thanks Judith.

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  17. flaubertMay 27, 2011 at 12:01 PM

    Thanks very much, Kaykuala.

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  18. flaubertMay 27, 2011 at 12:01 PM

    Thanks Sherry.

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  19. ReneeMay 27, 2011 at 3:09 PM

    A bit haunting but probably so reminiscent of so many lives and you bring me there into this one. Nicely done!

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  20. flaubertMay 27, 2011 at 3:34 PM

    Thanks Renee, it could describe many a person's life. Sad but true.

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  21. The PoetMay 27, 2011 at 6:34 PM

    Lovely imagery here.

    Nicely done!

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  22. flaubertMay 27, 2011 at 7:57 PM

    Thanks Andy.

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  23. PeggyMay 28, 2011 at 10:50 PM

    I am late with my comment on this very effective sleepless hot night poem--chocolate melting and all! Seems to me to show that between sleep and awake state of being--what a relief either sleep or daylight!

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  24. flaubertMay 29, 2011 at 3:06 PM

    Thanks Peggy. It has been an inferno here, and believe that where much of this came from.

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  25. PeggyMay 29, 2011 at 3:30 PM

    Looking for a way to e-mail you directly Pamela but will try this. You asked about Guatemala--we LOVED it. We had expected it to be Mexico-South, but it was so distinct. There are of course the drug cartels there now, but you might be familiar with them living in Mexico. We were glad to have out guide and always felt quite safe. He was a marvelous person. I can send you his name and more details about our trip. Peggan@aol.com

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  26. flaubertMay 29, 2011 at 5:59 PM

    Thanks Peggy. Will email you right away. No drug cartels in this area as of yet. Thank goodness.

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  27. EllaMay 30, 2011 at 9:37 PM

    It felt like a dream, wonderful and visually stunning~

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  28. ElizabethJune 2, 2011 at 9:48 AM

    Life is a lot like chocolate, melting slowly in our hands. You capture the moment with vivid language that slowly melts into the mind. Good one Pamela,

    Elizabeth

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  29. Serving Hugs on a Platter and Tears in a TeacupAugust 20, 2011 at 3:46 PM

    Great job Pam!

    Hope you've been well! I've missed ya!

    ~alaurilee

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