"Life is the dancer and you are the dance."
— Eckhart Tolle

Saturday, June 12, 2010

Life writer's island #7 the gift

If something is given

Then something must be taken

Gesture of abhorrence is

The abuse that forms from within



Remember the day of feeling

Given to extent of capability

Reach the corridor of sensitivity

If something is given



Look deep within your shoes

Feel inside your gloves

Check your pockets carefully

Then something must be taken



A blind man on the street

Looks for sight from a tin cup

Cardboard boxes line the alley

Gesture of abhorrence is



Broken bones and bruised limbs

Crippled and invalid in your mind

Recalling that life is for living

The abuse that forms from within
Posted by flaubert at 12:43 PM

24 comments:

  1. Julie Jordan ScottJune 12, 2010 at 1:32 PM

    Wow - you tucked form within your gift. BRAVO! Grewat work, dear Pamela!

    Read my Gift poem here.

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  2. Stan SkiJune 12, 2010 at 7:34 PM

    Great structure - We should always be aware that what we give may take something away from the receiver.

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  3. flaubertJune 12, 2010 at 8:11 PM

    Julie
    Thanks and this is my first cascade poem. I have been reading a lot about form and decided to try something new. Pamela

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  4. flaubertJune 12, 2010 at 8:13 PM

    Stan
    Thanks I do not use form. And this ended up being a fun exercise for me. So true we should be more aware.
    Pamela

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  5. MaryJune 12, 2010 at 8:45 PM

    I did enjoy the form of your poem, Pamela. I'm going to have to try a cascade poem too (ala Robert Brewer) just for something different than my usual.

    Your words "If something is given, then something must be taken" give me food for thought tonight.

    http://inthecornerofmyeye.blogspot.com/2010/06/gift.html

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  6. flaubertJune 13, 2010 at 12:23 AM

    Mary
    Thanks and this was an interesting way to write. It is food for thought.
    Pamela

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  7. anthonynorthJune 13, 2010 at 3:42 AM

    This is powerful and very well structured.

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  8. Diane TJune 13, 2010 at 7:01 AM

    I really liked the third stanza, which says to me that a person can always find something to give if he/she reaches! Interesting form.


    http://troublebeingstrong.blogspot.com/2010/06/let-me-speak.html

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  9. flaubertJune 13, 2010 at 10:11 AM

    Anthony
    Thanks for the nice comment!
    Pamela

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  10. flaubertJune 13, 2010 at 10:13 AM

    Diane
    It is all about the give and take in life is it not? Thanks for stopping by!
    Pamela

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  11. ElizabethJune 13, 2010 at 6:08 PM

    You have made me remember that I have not written nearly enough poetry lately. You have given/I have taken. Thank you.

    Elizabeth

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  12. flaubertJune 13, 2010 at 6:44 PM

    No problem Elizabeth! Thanks
    Pamela

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  13. Linda GoinJune 13, 2010 at 11:54 PM

    I haven't tried the four-line stanza cascade yet, Pamela -- I like how you handled that form. Bravo! "Looks for sight from a tin cup" is an amazing way to think of a gift for a blind man.

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  14. flaubertJune 14, 2010 at 12:53 AM

    Gracias Linda and this is an interesting form to write! Congrats again!
    Pamela

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  15. flaubertJune 14, 2010 at 8:37 AM

    Thanks whitesnake!
    And thanks for stopping by!
    Pamela

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  16. brenda wJune 14, 2010 at 1:48 PM

    Pamela, You are inspiring me. Now I want to try a cascade. This one tumbled down so well. Your poem is intense and interseting. You really have a unique take on this prompt. Well done!

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  17. flaubertJune 14, 2010 at 2:00 PM

    Oh Brenda so good to see you!
    yes this an interesting way to write!
    And thanks so much!
    Pamela

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  18. vivienne blakeJune 15, 2010 at 1:12 PM

    Thank you for this: you've sent me off on a treasure hunt. I may be some time...
    ViV

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  19. flaubertJune 15, 2010 at 11:17 PM

    Viv
    Thanks and happy hunting ;)
    Pamela

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  20. WeaselJune 17, 2010 at 1:33 PM

    Nicely written! I enjoyed reading!

    -Weasel

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  21. AnonymousJune 17, 2010 at 3:21 PM

    I don't agree with the premise of your opening lines but I like the way you express it.

    http://thelaughinghousewife.wordpress.com

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  22. flaubertJune 18, 2010 at 12:25 PM

    Weasel thanks for saying so!
    Pamela

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  23. flaubertJune 18, 2010 at 12:26 PM

    Thanks Tillybud!
    Pamela

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  24. Mr. WalkerJune 18, 2010 at 3:42 PM

    I like your take on giving - and taking. And now I have to try my hand at a cascade poem.

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