"Life is the dancer and you are the dance."
— Eckhart Tolle

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

my soul RWP #120 (In this pic I saw death)

they come for my soul in the carriage

they have gathered, oh why can’t I live?

the black curtain has moved back

exposing me



my body is emaciated and wrinkled beyond recognition

starvation came to me slowly

to be spoon fed day by day

it couldn’t be done successfully (though they tried)



i veil behind eyes closed eternally

never to open yet again, no heartbeat

not at all to be heard from within

i want my soul to go somewhere temperate



that was the thing I loved

when I was amongst the living

they have perched around my carriage

am I ready to give my soul away?



 
 
 
 
 
 
 

The gathering by Alice Popkorn 
Posted by flaubert at 8:55 AM

22 comments:

  1. anthonynorthApril 1, 2010 at 2:05 AM

    This is harrowing in places. Beautifully done.

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  2. UnknownApril 1, 2010 at 7:52 AM

    Hi Pamela,

    Who wouldn't want to go somewhere temperate?! I like that the birds have come to carry your soul to another place rather than as scavengers.

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  3. AnonymousApril 1, 2010 at 12:21 PM

    Thought provoking. Especially love the opening line.

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  4. spiritsoflenaApril 1, 2010 at 1:23 PM

    I really like your take on the picture. It made me think of Dickinson's "Because I Could Not Stop for Death".

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  5. Wayne PitchkoApril 1, 2010 at 4:54 PM

    nicely done Pam

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  6. flaubertApril 1, 2010 at 5:42 PM

    Anthony,
    It is always a pleasure to hear from you. Thanks! What's you take on RWP closing down? Let's keep in touch.
    Pamela

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  7. flaubertApril 1, 2010 at 5:43 PM

    Derrick,
    Thanks! I also want the birds to take my soul someplace else. Thanks for stopping by.
    Pamela

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  8. flaubertApril 1, 2010 at 5:45 PM

    Matt,
    Thank you so much! And thanks for stopping by. I am right now checking out on the poems that were submitted in Napowrimo and I loved yours.
    Pamela

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  9. flaubertApril 1, 2010 at 5:46 PM

    SOL,
    Thank you so much for the nice comment. And thanks for stopping by.
    Pamela

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  10. flaubertApril 1, 2010 at 5:47 PM

    Wayne, Wayne, Wayne! Where the heck have you been? I missed you stopping by. Are joining in Napowrimo? Thanks for the nice comment.
    Pamela

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  11. Tumblewords:April 1, 2010 at 7:38 PM

    I love the depth and semi-finality - that thought remains even as the crows gather to abscond with the soul.

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  12. flaubertApril 1, 2010 at 8:26 PM

    Susan,
    Thanks so much! I always enjoy you stopping by. This is a very dark image for me.
    Pamela

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  13. KarenApril 2, 2010 at 5:49 AM

    I love the question at the end. I felt the darkness of this one, too, Pamela. You do it justice!

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  14. AnonymousApril 2, 2010 at 9:01 AM

    Powerful as always...loved this!

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  15. Cynthia ShortApril 2, 2010 at 9:29 AM

    Quite a spooky feeling to this, along with some very deep sadness. "Am I ready to give my soul away?" is such a haunting ending.

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  16. flaubertApril 2, 2010 at 10:51 AM

    Karen,
    Thanks so much! I always appreciate your comments!
    Pamela

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  17. flaubertApril 2, 2010 at 10:55 AM

    Lori,
    Thank you! You are so kind! I loved yours as well.
    Pamela

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  18. flaubertApril 2, 2010 at 11:04 AM

    Cynthia,
    Thanks for the comment! I always enjoy you stopping by. I see you also saw sadness in this pic.
    Pamela

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  19. JamesApril 2, 2010 at 2:09 PM

    I really like the line "i veil behind eyes closed eternally." I keep thinking about the word veil... so well done.

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  20. flaubertApril 2, 2010 at 2:13 PM

    James,
    Thanks so much! My husband even questioned me using veil as a verb. And I told him why not? It works here. Thanks for stopping by.
    Pamela

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  21. Raven's Wing PoetryApril 6, 2010 at 10:21 AM

    I echo Cynthia's comment -- this has a very spooky feel to it. And I *love* your last line ("am I ready to give my soul away?").

    -Nicole

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  22. flaubertApril 7, 2010 at 12:02 AM

    Nicole,
    Thanks so much for your kind words. Thanks for your pw.
    Pamela

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